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Balçiçek Palmir on motherhood: Crowded but happy life!

Balçiçek Palmir on motherhood: Crowded but happy life!


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The twins are over three years old, how does it go with them?
Life with them is really busy. Both television programs, newspapers and home tempo, life continues without breath. However, I set up a different system to myself before 2 am I do not go to work. So in the morning I wake them up, we have breakfast together. I'm bringing them to their nests. Sometimes we even have lunch together. I think this is a very important luxury for me. Since I don't work on weekends, I spend all my time with them. If you say it is exhausting, yes it is exhausting, but it is also incredibly enjoyable.

Then it is planned and programmed lı
Yes, I am already very organized in every aspect of my life. I think if a person lives organized, he can find time for everything. The important thing is that it took me a year and a half to settle this issue. Now, when the children are in kindergarten, I make business calls, plan the day and act accordingly.

When did they start home?
They have been going home for a year, they cried a little in the first week, but then they adapted very quickly.

How did the twins change your life?
After I had twins, everything in my life changed. First I changed; now you have a completely different Balçiçek. I think many things have changed from my vision to my work perspective and writing.

Like what?
I was more conscientious and patient. I started to look at life more positively, free from ambitions.

Does having a child really despise one's ambitions?
Yeah, but this time you have other ambitions. For example, when you live a career-oriented life, you leave this ambition aside after you have a child. The interesting thing is that your career is going much better after you put aside this ambition. It's a weird situation, but it really is. My priorities changed after I had children. I brought two people into the world, and now my priority is to be able to raise two decent people, to ensure their future. And the hardest job in the world is to raise a child and make a good personality. The first four years are taking shape in your hands, children, so suddenly you're under a terrible responsibility and inevitably you panic. In addition, money is becoming much more important; When you don't care about earning more or less, you panic when you say that after you have children, you will be home, school and the future. Then, when you stop and think about it, you realize that you are inadvertently pushing your priorities to the background, and you settle down. I think I'm in that period, I'm looking at everything more discreet and calm.

Are you a panic mother?
I'm not a panic in motherhood or in normal life. Everyone thought I was going to be a very panic, meticulous and dominant mother. On the contrary, I've been a very quiet, much more relaxed mother than I expected. Of course, when children fall violently, "Oh dear what?" But because I leave my kids alone without bored, they grow up very easily.

What do you think are the differences between being a twin mother and being the mother of one child?
Believe me, I don't. I can't answer that question, because I don't know what it's like to be an only child.

What's it like to be a twin mother?
Simply “crowded”. A sense of not being able to keep up and constantly thinking that nothing is enough. Sometimes I feel my love, my care is not enough. Or I feel guilty; I wonder if I like the girl more today or the boy… Life is constantly rushing through the hustle and I feel like I can not get enough of them. I wish I had a child and spent time with him.

Then would you like to have another child?
No, I don't think of any more kids anymore.

You got pregnant as a result of the treatment, didn't you, how long did your treatment last?
Took a long time. Because I had miscarriages, I had an ectopic pregnancy.

Didn't they intimidate you?
There were times when I thought it wouldn't work at all. At that time, the cats living in my garden were constantly pregnant and giving birth. Even the cats are chopping, but I'm starting to think I can't have them. I had given up my full hope and decided not to force it anymore, so I found out that I was pregnant again. It didn't come as a surprise to me, but I thought, lar Will they be standing in my stomach this time? Çok I was glad after the first three months.

How did it go after the first three months?
It was a very difficult and painful process for me, because I lost my father in the fifth month of my pregnancy and after a very short time I lost my grandmother. Part of my family is gone. It was a sad period for me and a challenging time for having a twin pregnancy. I've had bleeding a couple of times, but thank goodness it's all over. I just wish I could get pregnant again so I could see what a normal pregnancy is like.

How did you feel when they were separate sexes and separate twins?
I thought I was the dearest servant of God. After all the trauma and frustration I had, it made me feel very good.

How was the birth?
Birth was very comfortable, they gave general anesthesia. Children were born close to three pounds, did not even enter the incubator. It took me a day or two to recover from birth, and getting used to breastfeeding was a bit challenging because I was breastfeeding not one. When I started breastfeeding them separately, I enjoyed breastfeeding.

How long did you breastfeed?
I've been breastfeeding for a month and a half.

Who looked after the birth?
We actually made a deal with a babysitter, but he got away! The first ten days we took care of my wife. Then we had a nanny, two years he helped. Now we have another nanny. But our nannies were always helpful, I actually took care of them.

At the end of the first year, did you become a master of all things, fully fighting their twins?
Yes, after twins turned one year old, feeding them both at the same time, making them sleep, playing with them became routine tasks that I could do with the blind eye. I was able to deal with my twins alone, whether it was our assistant or my mother, which is a very nice feeling.

How can Lal and the North get along?
They're very good. I hear it's hard to get the twins to get along so well. However, they are very interdependent, perhaps because one of them is a girl and the other is a boy. They argue from time to time, but they are very fond of each other, which makes me very happy. In the past, me and my wife used to take one of the twins and take it out and spend a special time, the pedagogue suggested it, but we can't do it anymore. Because immediately ner Where is Lal? Why isn't he with us? Why didn't the North come? ”

Who named them?
The name Lal was a name we already knew and wanted, and my sister suggested the North name, and we liked it very much.

What kind of father was your wife?
They're very good. They play games together. Very relevant.

You have two dogs in your house, did you ever hesitate that it would not be hygienic for children?
I grew up in a house with a dog, we had a dog for as long as I could remember. I don't know how a house without a dog is. The first year after the children did not enter the children's rooms, we did not give them the opportunity to be nose to nose. Now it's on top of each other. Children and dogs are having fun.

Is the tattoo on your neck new or anything?
Yeah, I got it done three months ago, my kids' name says it. I've wanted tattoos for a long time, but tattooing is something very special to me. It doesn't mean I'm gonna go out there and draw it, but it has to mean something because it's gonna stay with you forever. Some of them have tattooed the names of their boyfriends and spouses and try to wipe them out when things happen. I can't think of anything more meaningful than children's names to get tattoos. The children are already engraved in our lives. Thus, in Arabic, on the back of the shiny and garnished, I made wings next to them. Because they're my angels.

What was their reaction?
I told him when he came home after I got a tattoo. Actually, I didn't think they would understand, but I was wrong, every time they think of it, they make it recount. They liked having something in my body that belonged to them.

Interview Müge Serçek
Photo of Tuna Yılmaz


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